|
Original
Writings |
|
the california series
part 1 - the
bus
 It
had been going on for days. He'd sit on the bus a few seats in front
of me, thinking he was being inconspicuous I guess. But I could see
his backward looks out of the corner of my eye. It was driving me
crazy, like puppy love does when you're not the puppy. I finally
found my opportunity at a Sbarro in the middle of Indiana. I sat
down before he could notice behind a plastic plant at the end of the
pasta bar. Through the plant I could see him at the marinara sauce,
looking quickly around the seats to see where I might have gone. I
had the element of surprise.
"Why you followin' me?" I said loudly, popping a teeny
garlic toast into my mouth.
"What!?" His look of panic gave way to a crafty insolence.
He'd obviously seen Peter Lorre in The Maltese Falcon.
"Because you're writing about me, that's why."
"Says who?" said I, unable to conceal my immigrant
heritage.
"Do you deny it?"
"Deny this," I said, still in character. "If I catch
you paying attention to my business again you'll wish writing was my
only talent. Now beat it, and sit somewhere else from now on."
What the Hey, maybe I'll take a gander at
the the rest of this
story
I've got
nothing better to do
|
|
|
|
Recipe |
|
Mick
O'Connell's T-Boner Aloner More
info Mick O'Connell
INGREDIENTS
24-oz T-bone steaks from Dreher's butcher shop
1 small Weber® hibachi with charcoal and copious amounts of
lighter fluid
2 chilled cases of micro-brew beer from the Northwest
Region
1 Buck knife
1 Bottle opener
INSTRUCTION
1) Use bottle opener to get access to beer. Drink six or
seven bottles before worrying about the grill. 2) Douse coals
with the lighter fluid and "let her rip!" Repeat
until coals stay lit. 3) Consume six more beers. Beat guests
soundly at a few games of Cricket (darts, not the game that
gapers like Hugh Grant and Prince William are now popularizing
in Jolly old England). Take relief somewhere in the backyard,
just not too close to the fire. 4) Grill may be dirty from
prior use. Slap it against a cooler or the side of the house
in order to shake off unwanted debris. 5) Salt, pepper and
throw the slabs of beef onto the grill. Leave it sit for a few
beers. Flip and leave it sit for a few more. Serve with beers.
Give leftovers to Newfoundlands.
|
|
|
"Poco
después de que me mudé a Tucson en el verano de 1995, yo fui
a "Marana Skydiving Center" con dos amigos. Mi amigo
Chris sugirió la aventura porque él era un paracaidista.
Para mi amiga Rebecca y yo, fue la primera vez. Nosotros
escogimos intentar un "static line jump." Con un
"static line jump," el paracaidas se abre
automaticamente porque una cuerda sujeta el avión y el
paracaidas. Para intentar un "static line jump,"
tuvimos que participar en una clase por cuatro horas en la
mañana. En la clase, aprendimos a lanzarnos del avión con
nuestros brazos y piernas extendidas y nuestras espaldas
arqueadas. Aprendimos a contar hasta siete y a desenganchar el
primer paracaidas si no funcionaba, entonces a abrir el
segundo. En la tarde, después de la clase, Rebecca y yo nos
pusimos los paracaidas y entramos en un avión pequeño con
otro estudiante, el "jumpmaster," y el piloto.
Cuando mi turno llegó, yo no pensé, solamente me lancé. Mi
paracaidas se abrió sin problemas y yo empecé a flotar a la
tierra. Yo tenía una radio debajo de mi mentón para que los
instructores me dijeran cómo aterrizar. Para girar a la
izquierda, yo daba un tirón a la cuerda con mi mano derecho.
Para girar a la derecha, yo daba un tirón a la cuerda con mi
mano izquierdo. ¡Era muy emocionante! Desafortunadamente,
después de una cita desagradable con el
"jumpmaster," yo me sentí azorada y yo no pude
volver. ¡Yo era una chica muy tonta!"
Who
is La Ella Caliente
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Last Update: 05/23/2007
|
the
Goliard 
a
repository
A Mystic Ponders His Promotion
After
Mystic, Whither?